I don't know if I've changed

but I know I am tired.

I am tired of thinking,
of running,
of hoping,
of wishing,
of pursuing,
of worrying,
of the tears of frustration that I held back.

I want to let go,
to give up and walk away,
to be relax and let my burden down,
to feel my shoulder less tense,
to feel fresh
to feel renew, rejuvenated.

I need holiday. I seriously do.


Why do I torture myself? Why do I abuse myself like this?

What's all these mental abuse for?

I guess it is PMS or I freaking tak cukup tidur or the chat I had with my neighbour or the pressure that is building up in the air. Nothing much to pressure about but I am pressure. Sigh~~

I guess I'm still the same. I still think too much.